chemo two (or, I didn't faint)

as in, I almost did (it was on Monday). the nurse couldn't get the IV in my hand-vein, but it took about 8 pushes to determine that, so I was a bit woozy. a bit of a recline and a half-sandwich later, I was ready to roll, and it was easy peasy. since she had to go up to my inner elbow (or whatever that's called), I couldn't really knit, so I watched a movie on the iPad that Hali's colleagues bought for me!!!

the chemo and the day itself are really no big whoop -- they place the IV, draw blood to make sure my white blood cells and I don't know what else are doing ok, then the mix up my brew of chemicals in the basement (ok, pharmacy), and in they go. proceeded by a potent combination of godblessthem anti-nausea meds. I feel fine that day and the next, and then I slide slowly downhill for a couple of days. achey today, but headed to work like yesterday.

tomorrow, I'll likely stay home, as the achey feeling is now getting compounded by a less-desired cancer present; it seems that my hair is falling out. a few yesterday at a time, a few more at a time (downstairs too!), and I think today might have been my last hairwashing, as I think tomorrow I will feel flu-ish and not take a shower, and then if it seems like it's coming out faster by tomorrow, we'll do the big baldy shave tomorrow night. it's a hard step, not helped by the fact that my scalp is likely so white it's grey...

and then I will look like a major religious gal, with my old hair back on and a hat all the time. we are planning to have dinner with friends tonight, so I asked Hali to bring a camera to document this point in the process -- I have really really like the lighter, somewhat sassy feeling of having the ubershort hair. (it's not a great pic, so imagine that in better lighting and with a better outfit, it's fabulous.) I think that by the time we go on vacation (where nobody will see me! why would I care? I guess for the milestone, something to look forward to), I might look sassy again.

meanwhile, we are doing great -- the meals that friends have made for us are beautiful and delicious and have included an occasional bottle of wine, hearty soups and gorgeous salads and all manner of other things...so grateful.

chemo one

one month later, and I did get the emma watson haircut -- ok, only from the front (my hair stylist needed all the length from the back, so it's a definite buzz back there), and ok, in just plain brown, and ok, I'm neither 20 nor a stunning actress, nor 115 pounds. but really, I basically look like her, don't you think? ;)

otherwise, I had my first chemo yesterday, and mostly it took a while from the waiting, not the chemo itself. that was one 15-minute push of adriamycin and an hour of cytoxan, which meant one hour of knitting and reading a magazine all by myself during normal waking hours!

they also gave me a variety of anti-nausea stuff (yea!) and I'm taking supplements to help with health-maintenance issues, so maybe the biggest cause of my headache and exhaustion is Nina's early mornings... so we'll see if I continue to feel ok, and meanwhile:

* Nina loves playing with water in the sink -- she will drag whichever chair or stool is closest and process to spill, pour, splash for a LOOONG time.

* I have finally truly entered knitting a tunic for her to wear to a cousin's bar mitzvah in March (better get cracking), after a few mis-starts.

* we have been so blessed by the beautiful meals friends have brought to us, nourishing and delicious and interesting!

and now, I must nap.