navigating simplicity

so, where to begin? our little sprout is 4 months old, I'm back at work, about to launch into part-time childcare for Nina (something I'd never really envisioned...), and trying to figure out how to simplify our life, weave together the experiences and needs of one pre-existing child with my priorities for our family, and not spend so much of that time on the internet!

small accomplishment: I have knitted a couple of cloths for Nina, which were to be washcloths, but seem to be little lickie cloths at the moment. I made them with red yarn from a never-completed sweater for a friend's son. son is now 15. (!).

I just may follow my friend Casey's lead and start ordering a weekly vegetable delivery from Boston Organics -- which seems like a compromise between a CSA which hasn't been the right mix of veggies for our family, and going to a farmer's market, which just isn't in the cards yet due to my still trying to navigate my life.

the hard part: Hali was single for several years before we met, working full-time and going to school, and Jo has Cerebral Palsy and is (basically) an only child (she has 2 older half-sisters, but they're grown and in the world. As a result, Hali became accustomed to Jo watching a lot of junky TV -- it was the only break Hali had to do things like make dinner and such -- and we also own a Wii. Apparently the Wii is, in theory, good for Jo to work on strengthening her muscles and coordination (she uses one with her OT), and as a child who is sporty -- and an only child, and one with CP, and therefore not so easily able to play sports with other kids -- the Wii makes some things possible that wouldn't otherwise be an option without a tremendous effort of time, money, and/or expense, none of which we have at the moment.

So what do I do? I don't want Nina growing up with iCarly in the background. Probably I mostly need to chill the heck out, but I'd love others' perspectives on becoming a simple-living family. Hali does support my interests for the most part, and TV watching has gone down, so perhaps I need to be more patient and put more energy into what I can do and less into what others are or are not doing, and go from there...

hanukah with kids

the best package ever arrived in the mail from Gram and Zayde! for years, I've felt bad not to have given my mom grandchildren because I know that she would send them the cutest little packages...

and now I have.

and she did.

striped tights and a polka-dot hat and onesies and teething rings for Nina.
Hello Kitty markers and a journal and a notepad for Jo.
dark chocolate and tea for us.
a batch of her oatmeal cookies for everyone.
and yes, even a sweater for the dog! (says: bah humbug)
the gifts were wrapped in color comics (I'm originally from St. Louis, where there are color comics every day!) and the chinese american news and little organza bags -- blue and white for Hanukah -- except o yea! the chocolate gelt in a gold bag. ;)

a totally sweet package, a box filled with small treats.

and then today, I spent the day making hot cocoa mix for Jo's teachers and some local folks, and then wrapping them up with ribbon and fabric. very slowly working my way up to Lynn's level (familiystylelove.blogspot.com) -- with a long way to go!

So, I had 8 weeks of 'maternity leave' -- in quotation marks because during that time, I had to officiate at 5 bar/bat mitzvahs, prepare a curriculum for my 10th graders, and get some things together for the cantor, which required a number of backs and forths... Now, the plan was to have my first two weeks back at work be half-weeks (i.e. 15 instead of 30 hours), but I am now headed for 30 hours just this week alone, plus an unexpected funeral.

Of course, the work itself is a bit of a juggle -- being back at work with the babe is interesting -- as a rabbi I'm either supposed to be thinking Big Serious Meaningful Thoughts and/or having a Meaningful Interaction with a congregant or student. Mostly what I do is jiggle the baby and try to sound like I'm typing Something Very Important. My congregation is 45 minutes away, so I'm also juggling her nap time to try to coincide with driving. works sometimes; others, not so much.

In the meantime, Nina is doing great -- first of all, she has fabulous head control (it's a start!), smiles lots, and is doing great at sleeping. A couple of feeds in the night, but they're dream feeds, so we're both pretty happy.

ok. time to cram before teaching later this morning!

health

whew. from curious to scary to fine...

for a few days, I'd noticed that Nina seemed to have a mucousy ear. I really didn't think it was a big deal, just strange -- but the doc said the words "children's hospital-ER-rule out meningitis" and that made for some scariness.

so I got Hali and went, and fell apart and held it together alternatingly, and it seems that Nina has swimmer's ear (aka out ear infection). I was so scared when I thought my baby daughter might be seriously sick...dear god. and grateful to live 10 minutes from boston children's hospital.

and now, she's just sitting on Hali's lap, doing the same silly jiggle-head and tongue-trick things Hali is doing, and I am amazed that she can mimic things already, and amazed at our good fortune...

newborn life

So, I'm doing ok here in newbornland -- some nights are better than others, but clearly, not overstimulating her with running around during the day is key. Yes to going out, no to going to 5 places in one day. We went for our first walk yesterday -- I put her in the stroller and walked around the neighborhood, then stopped at home, grabbed my library card and walked there to get 2 books I had on hold (it was 3 actually, but the third was Ina May's Guide to Childbirth -- too late!). Who knows if I'll actually get to read the books, but it felt great. I've also learned to start the day slowly for now, going down to make my coffee after H & J leave, then climbing back in bed for a nurse/snooze with Nina. makes the day immensely better. Today, I have already prepped dinner and I am nearing the end of the 4-6 washing/drying cycles for the diaper inserts. Which means that very soon, we will bite the bullet and become CD mamas!

In Nina's first two weeks, she went to a Rosh Hashanah lunch (at 5 daysold!), attended three high holiday services, went to my favorite grocery store, and came along for that trip to the library!

Didn't post this when I wrote it yesterday, so I can now add that Nina's tushie is now safely ensconced in a cloth diaper. Love doing it, but I have to say, it's not as trim as those disposables...plus, what with being dressed and all, you can't see the CUTEness of the cloth, alas. ;)

arrived.

our sweet Nina is here. She eats like a champ, sleeps like a dream -- well, except for 2-4 AM...

Sometimes I get overwhelmed at her vulnerability and that she is my/our responsibility for everything, and other times, I feel so completely blessed to teach her about trees and French toast and walking on the beach. Her big sister (H's daughter) has taken quite a liking to her new little sister, thank GOODNESS. My mom is here for 2 weeks, which has been great. I feel a bit spoiled, but it really is nice to have someone bring me a glass of water, or hold her little granddaughter while I take a shower, all of it. Jo seems to be connecting even more with my parents as her own grandparents, with no pushing from us. We've encouraged the relationship, but we've been careful not to push her to see them as grandp's unless and until she chooses to.

I am loving being a mom, loving feeding her, staring into her sometimes-open eyes, amazed that she looks like me and is at the same time very much her own person...what will this be, motherhood?

39+ weeks

well, I'm 2 months into my rabbi gig, and 9 months into my pregnancy gig. I'm now at home (i.e. not going to work until after my maternity leave!), which is great, and I am totally ready for this little duckling to emerge... The only thing I really want to do is cook, simply because I like to cook -- but between the swollen achy ankles and the neuropathy in my hands from the pregnancy/carpal tunnel phenomenon, even cooking seems to leaved me wiped out.

and today, Hali greeted me in the kitchen with some good news-bad news. bad news: we need a new water heater (old one seems to be leaking all over the basement floor). good news: we're alive and well and the guys will be here to replace it in the next 2 hours. My life really has gone from single gal in the city to home-owning-family-person in a very short time!

interdependence day

so, apparently I've ignored the blog for a while...in the meantime, I'm now 32 weeks pregnant and MARRIED!!! H and I were married on Sunday, the first weekend of sun in about a month, and I am happy happy happy...

a few things I would do differently if I could have a do-over: 1. I would get the cake from my favorite bakery. (the cupcakes we did, at each table, were actually a bit dry, and the cake from my favorite place, which we did have two nights before the wedding, is STILL perfect.) 2. I would have a definite dance floor and a DJ. (we used an iPod, and things just didn't fall into place, dance-wise. 3. I would serve twice as much sangria. (it was fabulous.)

photos soon! 

I am loving being pregnant, loving feeling this babelet move around, and I am tremendously glad that between now and then, I only have to go to work, live my regular life, and drink more water. buying a house, graduating, negotiating a job, planning a wedding, and getting married have been a bit much activity! 

employed

So, it appears that I will be graduating with a job!  (phew.) Once contract details are worked out, I am going to be the rabbi of a 220-family Reform congregation -- the people have been wonderful, and though I will have a long commute, I will usually be there only 3 days per week.  

While right now I am a single person, renting a very cute little apartment by myself, in just a few short months, I will be (godwilling) a homeowner, spouse, parent and step-parent, co ngregational rabbi, and mind-boggled person.

the zodiac up there is from the 6th-century synagogue at Beit Alpha, in northern Israel. I first saw this zodiac in a class -- during my first year of school -- on the book of Genesis, and then traveled to Israel that summer and saw it in person. While the tile-work in the synagogue where I'll be working is not quite that detailed, I have dreams...and yea, they're mostly architectural.

Meanwhile, the little Virgo inside of me seems to be dancing up a storm. I can't imagine that it has anything to do with the sugar high of the leftover toasted-coconut-marshmallows I just ate, does it? ;)

thumper

ok, so that may be overstating it a teensy, but last night I actually felt Cleo (that's her inside name) thump me a bit! it was definitely her, because my eyes just flew open that instant, and it was just...different from anything I've felt before. surreal and real and stunning. 

I had just been thinking yesterday evening about what a tremendous miracle it is how humans develop inside other humans from little gooey specks, and how amazing and convenient -- despite the discomforts of pregnancy -- that we literally get to carry them inside at the perfect temperature, getting them everything they need. it's just stunning. and then Cleo lets me know she's in there. and then I can just go about my night and day as I would. wild. and much easier than I know parenting will be...